This is the time of the year for everyone to make those New Years Resolutions. For most people they consist of weight loss and fitness goals, for me they will be a little different. I decided to focus my resolutions around my overall health and the well being of not just myself- but my family as well. I like to call these mom resolutions.
I will not sweat the small stuff
The piles of laundry pile up, the toys are scattered on the daily, but it’s not important. I will work to let these little things remain little and at the bottom of my priority list.
I will take 15 mins a day to myself
This is so important for my mental health. Whether it is 15 minutes to wash my face and relax or 15 minutes to read I will take them. I will allow myself the time to separate from my responsibilities and breath.
My exercise goal is not one of loosing weight or anything of the sort. For me, exercise is part of my overall well being. It does wonders for my mental health and I will dedicate 30 mins per day 5 xs per week. The intensity of my workout will vary on my day and that is okay. I will be flexible with it. Some days it will mean yoga others a walk and on those days where all seems to fall into place it will mean some weights as well. The key is to get my body moving.
Asking for Help
I will ask for help. My husband knows me to keep things bottled up and my to do list piling up only to end up breaking down because I couldn’t do it all. One of the most important resolutions for me is to ask for help. I will ask for help from my husband, my family, and my friends. When someone asks if I need anything- I will ask what I need. When someone asks what they can do to help I won’t say “Nothing.”
I will communicate
Maybe its the Latina in me, but I have a bad habit of feeling like people (mostly my husband ) should just know things, the things that need to get done or what I need. Turns out no one can read my mind and I need to carry on my life expressing what I need and feel instead of assuming people will just know.
With 4 kids time alone can some times be limited to the conversations we have as we put the kids to bed or clean up at the end of the night. Planning monthly dates is so important. We still need to focus on each other as well.
I LOVE the process of getting organized. From writing in my planners and calendars to color coding it all- it is something I truly enjoy. Staying organized is how I stay sane with 4 kids… it is also how I make sure not to forget things going on. I will take 20 mins per week to plan out my month and weeks and 5 mins per day to make sure I am on board for the following day.
I will let myself feel
We tend to push our feelings to the side because our family needs us. For me this usually ends up with some form of a break down after a few days or weeks of holding it all in. All things that could have been avoided. I won’t push these to the side- I will let myself feel
I will strive for happiness not perfection
This will probably be my greatest challenge. I am a Type A person inside and out. I have never known anything other than trying to be perfect, but with it I feel I have missed out on so much with my family and limited my kids. They need to be able to explore and have fun without worrying about the messes they leave around the house.
Going with the flow
This is something I have been horrible at. I am a person who plans and who does not adapt to the changes easily. I love structure and part of my postpartum anxiety stems from anxiety I have due to the inability of being able to accept things don’t always go as planned.
I will tell my kids I love them every day
It seems silly and almost expected, but are you certain you tell them every day? I want to make sure they know every day that I love them.
Start our day with positive affirmations
The power of positivity is so grand. I will have my kids chant positive affirmations with me to get our day started on a good side.
Thankfulness at Dinner
One thing we used to do and have stopped is naming one thing we are thankful for during dinner. I want to continue the feelings of gratitude with our kids.
I will try not to yell
My name is Karen and I am a yeller. I grew in a culture where raising our voices is not anything but normal. I didn’t realize how it affected my life until I became a parent. I see the faces on my kids when I raise my voice and I don’t want to continue to harm them that way. This is a huge work in progress for me- but something I am very dedicated to make happen. I want my kids to be happy.
I want 2020 to be a year of healing for me. After the birth of my twins I was diagnosed with postpartum depression and anxiety, it absolutely rocked me to my core. The world around me seemed to crumble at the slightest of things and I felt like I had a grasp of absolutely nothing. I had some of the darkest moments of my life in the last 5 months but have sought out help and continue to heal. 2020 will be a year of healing my body and my soul. Giving birth to two humans has changed everything about my life & body- I wish to heal it all.